Joe Sobran makes a good one:
I have no dog, or bitch, in this fight [between Anna and E. Pierce Marshall], and I am trying to be strictly impartial. Marshall has a strong legal case, but his stepmother can pose two commonsense questions, both of which will be hard to rebut: Why do you think the old man married her, anyway? And why do you think she married him, anyway?
E. Pierce should be ashamed of himself for trying to cheat a widow. His father got his end of the bargain, why shouldn’t Anna Nicole get hers?
Sobran makes a good case of a different sort here:
It’s easy, and irresistible, to joke about her. With all that makeup and the Texas Republican hairdo, she looks like a caricature, a female impersonator’s idea of feminine pulchritude. As Dolly Parton used to ask, “Do you realize how much it costs to look this cheap?”
But photographed without much makeup and with her honey-blonde hair straight, Anna is just a startlingly pretty woman, almost innocent-looking. Why would she think she can improve on her natural beauty with the disguise of artifice?